Intelligent Life

                            

What with the recent successes of the Mars landing and the ability of sophisticated telescopes to look far beyond our universe, have you noticed, Dear Friends, that scientists are now looking for intelligent life beyond Earth? Does this mean, Dear Reader, that they have searched our own planet and found us wanting?! Have they finally given up on the idea that there is intelligent life here on Earth?

There is a great deal of human folly and frailty out there, indeed, both qualities are pretty entrenched in my own modus operandi.  But, in my humble opinion, there is still intelligent life shuffling around Old Mother Earth, if we look hard enough. Sure and all, it is true that it won’t be found with the guy who discovered a hole in his gas tank and decided to weld it shut. He is no longer with us. Nor is it to be found amongst the hordes of spectators who crowded a Texas beach to watch a dead whale being blown up by an explosives expert.  There was a great deal of whale meat which rained down on many a picnicker that day, denting many a car bonnet. One shouldn’t be too cocksure of oneself here after all the Gods deal forcefully with the crime of hubris so I should admit that I once tried to read ‘A Brief History of Time’ by Stephen Hawking and couldn’t understand a word of it.  After that I turned to the novels of Margaret Atwood and didn’t understand them either. So there has not been a great billowing sail of confidence during Davidson’s voyage through life.  I retreated and found a set of multiple choice tests the most difficult question of which was:-

“Oh Canada” is the national anthem of what country?”

Hardly a ‘hold one’s head up with pride’ moment once one had answered that one but at least there was a slight raising of the Davidson chin which had been forlornly resting on his toes.  Ah, but I do but jest, Dear Reader. I know that there is intelligent life out there.  There is the chain smoker who won’t  get on an airplane for fear of terrorists; the alcoholic who still downs a bottle of vodka per day but only eats health foods. There is the Australian electorate which has now had a Prime Minister for longer than a week, something of a record in that country! There are the world leaders who still think that ruling with an iron fist represents freedom.  There is the CKNW news channel which joins forces with Global  TV News at 6.00 p.m. every evening and, at some point, reports on something which needs the visual of the TV to be understood. They  expect us listening in the car to be able to see the baby elephant being rescued from a mud hole or a dog winning a race at a school track meet?!

Now of course with the invention of Artificial Intelligence we risk being strangled in our beds by the vacuum cleaner; choked on a wedge of  pizza by the ‘Door Dash’ delivery robot.

“Alexa, play ‘All you need is love’ by the Beatles.” Thus do we demand of our in-house Smart radio system.

She refuses and instead one is subjected to hours of Wagner played loudly until one succumbs in the midst of a Brunnhilde solo. Death by opera.

OK, Dear Reader, this nonsensical claptrap from Davidson has gone too far. But, I do believe that we are in danger of intelligencing ourselves out of the intelligence market. One only has to reach for the ‘Google’ button these days to find a piece of information. Spell check stops us making spilling mistooks ; grimmitacal errors can be remedied at the clack of a baton.

Friends, it brings a whole new take on the old murder/mystery genre.  You will remember The Agatha Christie gathering in the library in the English manorial pile in the quaint, duck- ponded English village. The murderer is to be revealed by the intrepid amateur detective, Miss Marple.

“No, the butler didn’t do it. (Dramatic Pause). The dastardly deed was done by none other than—–(another pause for effect, a smidge of suspenseful music) the TV remote.” (Sharp collective intake of breath, aghast hands raised to mouths).

20- something heiress faints on the sofa, Lady of the house opens her mouth wide, maid screams, ancient, grouchy retired General exclaims , “I knew it”. In the stunned moment  of revelation, TV remote seizes its chance for escape, makes a dash for the open window and falls over the balcony to the gravelled driveway below, spilling its triple A batteries on contact. Not a scene for the squeamish or faint of heart.

OK, so now I have gone beyond silly for which I apologise. But, Dear Reader, this new blog will have enlightened you. You will now know that no intelligent life is to be found on the other side of this guy’s blog site.  But I will try to retrieve the situation. Here is a quotation from someone who is actually intelligent.

“You might love people despite their limitations, you might love them because of their limitations.”

                                                                Peterson

Be safe, my friends,